Marsden is Here

Last night Racky discovered a grey cat making an entrance to the house through the kitchen window (it's a bit easier to get up there given the woodpile now stacked underneath. There was a hiss and a brief scrap on the bench (one broken plate) before the interloper retreated with Racky in pursuit.

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Yesterday morning/afternoon accompanied slothphil and others to Orana park. Took some photos which I haven't looked at yet. The morning was quite pleasant, there was a picnic lunch but then the wind got up a bit.

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Gaming last night was quite pleasant, mostly due to it's blandness. We beat up the module boss, got our boat ungrounded and completed the sea voyage. Nothing controversial (that came to light, the new PC sneaking off and going on a looting spree notwithstanding).

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Today I have been going through this workbook for the redundancy workshops. I've completed the work histories, writing up my current job as two and including SAGA committeee as another. Haven't completed the Over self evaluation or Personal Assessment of Accomplishments - the latter of which requires me to formulate statements that might have come out of Dilbert.

I detest marketese/managementese.

The Career Drivers profile was more interesting though. Apparently my primary driver is Expertise (19/24) followed by Autonomy (17/24) then Material Rewards, Meaning, and Security (all coming in at 15/24). Brining up the rear are Afilliation and Status (each 8/24), Power/Influence (6/24) and Creativity (5/24).

No real surprises, although just looking ant the categories I might have ranked Security higher and Material Rewards lower they pretty much mean the same to me.I might have rated Creativity higher but when I think about it, I want to make something that works, not necessarily something unique.

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I think I shall find something a little more mindless to do for the evening.

The first half of my work week was relatively busy. This was good.

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Gaming on Tuesday was mostly somnolence inducing despite my best effort to form some direction. Not helped by the Draka apparently not having an opinion, the Faen not having a clue (tho' did remember an old unresolved plot) and the Litorian;s plater having been absent for so long that we're considering shelving the (admittedly useful) character rather than dragging him around as an NPC.

Need to come up with a money-making scheme which doesn't involve finding and looting yet another old ruin, pr running a safe errand for the guild (I don't think we could successfully and discreetly pull off any of the dodgy missions.)
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In other news the builder started the patio work yesterday. Photos when it's finished.

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In other other news I am afflicted by a tremendous hunger. I think the weekend's activity kicked my metabolism in the throttle.

I'm also sleeping erratically, with wierd-ass dreams. Tuesday night it was about losing my job - not this one but some employment scheme I was on in the future (by implication I had lost this one). It was working in some sort of appliance store in Ashburton, redchristoph was also there under similar circumstances. Last night it was being chased by/beating on a GE&R regular, with possibly some sort of coastal natural disaster going on in the background.

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In other other [twack] [wibble] I keep seeing the toys I want on special at really cheap prices - camera at $570 from $900, decent tablet at $3k from $5k. I really want the renovation bills / any sort of salary evaluation (unlikely but possible) / a few other little money matters sorted out so I know how much spare I have in this year's budget before the sales end.

I know it's just trying to prove to myself that I am in fact successful by some materialistic yardstick of modern society, but years of financial responsibility have to pay off sooner or later don't they? There's no point in saving for the good things in life (the ones money can buy, anyway) if you never get around to acquiring them.

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* "What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?
>> 'Hold my purse.'"

Reverse chronological order
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One player away last night slowed things down a bit. Still we got some stuff. Also had one of the most unnecessary fights ever thanks to the bloody Faen (R1). I completely failed to do anything useful in the fight, beyond getting the heavy fighter there by levitating him and towing him at my running speed rather than his.

Earlier in the session Lazakus got to revisit a traumatic event from his past in eidetic-memory detail, and then get trashed on some very strong "cleaning" alcohol (as our hosts don't drink alcoholic beverages).

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Racky is slowly regaining use of his leg. Still counts as crippled at the moment.

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No sign of work starting on the driveway.

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Gaming on sunday - I had an NPC party which should have been a challenge. None of them managed to roll above a 5 on the initiative dice and the PCs didn't break a sweat controlling the fight and almost wiping them out.

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Was stood up (or possibly lain down on) for the Home Show so I didn't get along in the end {grumpy}. Instead looked after Duncan for the afternoon to let doth try and get some much needed sleep prior to gaming.

I'm developing a bad habit of sleeping in, but I lack any motivation to get to work on time. And bed has been so cosy and warm these past couple of days.

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Gaming last night kept on track surprisingly well, although we actually did very little. I had one snappy moment at R1. So, so close to levelling ... it's a feat level, and the feat will have to wait. We're off to delve into another ancient ruin. I think, after this, it will be time to look at actually setting up a power base in one of these places.

It's nice to be dealing with a recurring NPC who actually approaches our power level. I got told off for not imposing further on the uberpowerful NPC who was with us to keep a portal open longer, but I don't like 'solving' problems that way.

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On the face of it I have plenty to do at work at the moment, but when I look ... you guessed it ... waiting on other people again. Most are legitimately busy, it's not the usual suspects.

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Lets see ... there was party on Saturday. It went much as expected. I accomplished my specific goal for the evening and was gone before midnight. Indications are that I didn't miss anything I would consider interesting, which makes a change. Or maybe not.

My headspace wasn't in the right place for Sunday's game, characterised by my constant searching through my notes and "quick" reference sheets. The players didn't seem particularly interested either, there was no real sense of direction or ... urgency. I admt to enjoying seeing the characters get beaten down a bit, and the knowledge that it only gets tougher.

The stump grinder is supposed to show for another go on Friday. The builder is supposed to show to take down the side fence on Monday and Tuesday, which presumably means the new one will be up by the end of next week.

Gaming last night also lacked direction. I threw out as many ideas as I could, but I seemed to be the only one trying. While dropping him home I corrected R1's assumption that since he's trying to play a wilderness character who is out of his element in the city that he couldn't legitimately come up with useful suggestions.

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They arrested a 14 yr old kid for dropping the fatal brick on the motorway. 14 is a heck of an age to be throwing the rest of your life (and someone else's) life away. Then ... I was only 15 when I almost did an equivalent. The only difference is I struck in anger while he deliberately created a hazard. Is either more acceptable tho'?

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Politics [spits]. I get nothing or next to nothing from either of the big bribes, so my strategic 3rd party vote doesn't change, and wouldn't even if I did.

Over on GE&R there is a thread titled "Oh shit! You mean, when I don't vote, other people make the decisions?". It's about the constitutional referendum in Iraq and how the Sunni's, who mostly boycotted the previous round are signing up to vote in droves because they've realised how they crippled their cause. Which is all well and good for a refendum, but for a general eloection one poster summed up my feelings reasonably well:

"With an electoral system in place instead of a true democracy, the result is the same. I can vote or I can not vote, and in 10 out of 10 Presidential elections my vote doesn't mean shit and it doesn't help my candidate one bit. We have the illusion of choice in America and nothing more. The party machines choose the candidates, not the American people. They choose which ones to back with cash and which ones to denigrate in the press. We are left with exactly what they want us to have. Our voting system is like a candy vending machine with 50 different choices, but only 2 of the choices work when you pull the knob. The rest of the items are sold out. Sold out by a system put in place to maintain power and eliminate most of what our government is supposed to represent; freedom, democracy, choice, representation. Debates limited to "the big two", campaign finance law that stifles third parties, party manipulation of candidates, the elctoral college. All of it maintains power for the powerful and presents us with the illusion of choice."

Substitute the appropriate NZ terms, except we do have it a bit better than the Americans, we do actually have smaller parties with a voice. But it's pretty much how I feel, other people make the decisions. I just want them to leave me alone.

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Buckets of Dice this weekend. I have to keep reminding myself of this - my mind slides away from it like bubbles in oil. I don't know whether it's some form of fatigue or just trying to avoid an anticipated feeling of disappointment. Can't bear to flirt with hope any more.

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though I get my kicks
it's slowly wasting me
don't try to be an artist
I try to be a man

dead stars, still burn