The Battle Hymn of the Ranapublic
Oct. 12th, 2025 10:05 amApropos current affairs in the USA, I went looking for the lyrics to "The Battle Hymn of the Ranapublic" (an old favourite of mine) online and despite trying multiple search engines could only find one single solitary copy remaining. (https://www.mummu.fi/poetry)
So here I am attempting to double that number. It would be /a real shame/ if more copies popped up.
So here I am attempting to double that number. It would be /a real shame/ if more copies popped up.
The Battle Hymn of the Ranapublic
by John Boardman
Mine ears have heard the croaking of the Giant Barded Frogs.
They are swimming through the marshes, they are leaping over logs.
They are eagerly devouring people, vampire bats, and dogs,
As they go hopping on!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
As they go hopping on!
Their hides are leather shields on which a sword has never stung.
They have claws upon the forefeet, they have barbs upon the toungue
With which they torture women who are sensitive and young
As they go hopping on!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
As they go hopping on!
They have armor-plated eyeballs and their teeth are made of brass,
Their breath corrodes titanium, their voices shatter glass,
They shoot snake venom from their jaws and napalm out their ass,
As they go hopping on!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
As they go hopping on!
They'll jump a seven-meter fence, they'll float like a balloon.
They'll swim like Flipper's brothers and they're fast as a typhoon.
In fact, they say that Armstrong found a couple on the Moon,
As they go hopping on!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
Glory, glory, ribbit ribbit!
As they go hopping on!